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“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”
―    Corrie Ten BoomClippings from My Notebook

Heard that powerful quote from Sunday’s sermon by Pastor Wes, entitled “Jesus’ Way to Overcoming Worry, Anxiety and Fear.”  That’s right. I LAUGHED when I read the title in the message notes. Then I started CRYING.  The sermon was all about the dangers of worry and that seeking the Father and His Kingdom first was the key.

My Sovereign Lord was trying to bring the whole thing to a close for me on Sunday. That thing that has been my struggle for a long time, but has reared its ugly head especially the last few weeks. That thing that has been draining my strength. That quote from Corrie Ten Boom was actually the second time I’d heard that concept in the past week.  He had already been telling me that even if “something bad” did happen, worrying about the possibility was not going to change it. So the quote just cinched it. I have been exhausted with the weight of worry and fear. It’s just too heavy. And it’s been choking me and tormenting me. Pastor Wes talked about the definition of worry on Sunday, and I’ve also blogged about that here and here.

I had truly been making some progress the last week or so – in turning over my worry and concern to God, in releasing some of my need to control situations, in giving my fear to His Hands, in trusting.  My “mantra” became “He’s in Your Hands, Lord” concerning my son and “You’re in control, not me” and “Your Will be done.” And every time I’ve said the words, I’ve received peace.  Hopefully, the Lord will not grow tired of hearing those words, because I imagine He will hear them many more times from me during my time here on earth.

Obviously worry and fear have been long-time companions of mine. My son’s leaving for Istanbul was not the major issue…but just a catalyst for this particular go-round.

When I was looking up the quote from Ten Boom, I found this site that lists several of her quotes and read another that pierced me: “Hold everything in your hands lightly, otherwise it hurts when God pries your fingers open.”

OUCH!!!! It HAS been hurting!

God also has been telling me to let my son go through devotions about Abraham and Isaac. YES, can you believe it? I have actually received a couple of devotionals from Genesis 22 PLUS my friend also did…which she read to me.  GC, GC, GC all over the place!

I may be stubborn, but I’m not stupid.

I want to be over this! I’m so done with it. I’m sick of myself. When I think of Corrie Ten Boom and many others who actually had/have a real reason for fear, worry, concern, I especially am disgusted with myself. Whiny baby.

God is so good to me, and He is so faithful, patient, and loving. I AM making strides. I AM learning. I AM growing. Sometimes I forget how far I’ve come because all I can see is how far I still need to go. I’d like it better if I had already learned everything I’m supposed to learn because this is all pretty tiring. But I guess that won’t happen until I’m Home. In the meantime, one step at a time. I’m getting one step closer each time.

Here are more of Ten Boom’s nuggets of wisdom that I loved:

  • “Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.”
  • “Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden.”
  • “There is no panic in Heaven!  God has no problems, only plans.”
  • “Worry is a cycle of inefficient thoughts whirling around a center of fear.”
  • “If God has shown us bad times ahead, it’s enough for me that He knows about them. That’s why He sometimes shows us things, you know – to tell us that this too is in His hands.”
  •  “And our wise Father in heaven knows when we’re going to need things too. Don’t run out ahead of Him.”